New Beginnings

A classroom with just two students – that’s what life was like until I began middle school. I was homeschooled with my brother, taught by my dad. When I joined public school, learning a different way now, I only had an iPad. It wasn’t until I started making friends that I witnessed kids, my age, dancing to music videos, texting each other (with sim cards, not Wi-Fi like me) and showing off their new phones. This was their normal and I wanted to fit in.

In the seventh grade, one year after my adjustment, I asked my dad for a phone. He didn’t say yes. Instead, he bargained with 12-year-old me who desperately wanted to be like the other kids. After hours of bickering, I agreed to his offer of receiving an iPod in exchange for going to China for a year after I graduated high school. I did not want to go to China despite my dad insisting “China is the future” and that this would be for my benefit. Before I was given the iPod my dad told me about China’s economic strength, the long history of China, and the community orientation China had. I didn’t care much about this opportunity because I didn’t understand what my dad was giving me, and this was seven years away anyways. Having an iPod was the closest I could get to being able to relate to my classmates, and I wanted more than ever to have that chance, not China.

Fast forward, the final part of the deal was closing in. For years, I didn’t even think about this offer. It was at the back of my mind. I was even gifted a phone for Christmas when I turned 18 – no strings attached. I was finally making an adjustment to normalcy; being similar, relatable, and even to be looked up to amongst my friends that I totally neglected that, a year from now, I would head to China. I was also busy trying to do what colleges wanted me to do; helping my community, maintaining good grades, interning, extracurriculars, having a job… It didn’t dawn to me that, soon, I was going to do what my dad wanted me to do.

I applied to one college, my “dream” college, thinking I had a high chance of getting in. During the covid pandemic, my dad decided to homeschool me and my brother again, and when I joined public school (for the second time from homeschool), I was unable to accrue credits for my junior year. Seven 0s hung on my transcript, running my grades through the mud. It wasn’t just that deterrent that barred me from an acceptance, but my inability to have properly communicated what college wanted from me – to be different.

It wasn’t in my plans to go to China if I got accepted to college. I planned to stay far away, 1600+ miles from home, studying computer science on the beaches of Santa Barbara where I thought I could relax and not have to worry about anything but my own problems. Since I got rejected, my journey changed. I had to change. Now everything I planned was processed for China. What city would I go to? What would I do every day? How would I speak to other people? After months of planning, a path was created.

I spent the last summer until going to China, working at my job (working out in my free time), quitting the restaurant business a month before my trek to spend time with friends, family, and planning. With my friends I reminisced and strengthened the bond that was soon to be cut.

My 2023-2024 is dedicated in Beijing, China, where I will be studying Chinese from a dorm at the Beijing Language and Culture University. By the end of this expedition, I want to be able to journal what I went through in a new language, driven towards a career that bridges cultures, assists others, and positively impacts society. It’s my goal that this adventure will engage me in a road to personhood, maturity, confidence, and understanding for life.